Monday, August 3, 2009

3rd August, 2009
Time, 1.00am

Moods swings again suddenly and started to think of many many things, from the past.... till now! Everyday I've been trying to improve myself and making myself to be tougher than before but it's difficult to be achieved when you start to feel you're doing everything all alone.

Times become not enough to be used and every single minutes is like a millions or billions dollar to you... You need to keep rushing to get something done on time! You just cant let any seconds being wasted....

For me, myself... my daily routine will be wake up on 7.00am in the morning and prepare myself to work till 6.00 / 6.30pm everyday. After off from work, I ain't like those others after work then can rest at home, watching TV show & etc. I've to gave wushu class for my students at the time of 7.30pm - 10.00pm and after that I got not more than a hours time to went for my supper then get home as fast as possible to get online and meet with some friends but most of the time I'll be reaching home bout 11.30pm and that's already kinda late for peoples that need to work on the next day, so probably I on my PC is to do some of my freelance work such as photographing work!

Frankly, I started to get bored with the fully scheduled or so called as the Fixed daily schedule for my life (sound scary if keep doing the same things for the whole life, eeeiikkk!)

So, I've been trying and trying to change my life from a boring lifestyle to something more interesting! I'm not highly educated and I'm not any University students & also I'm not from any rich family... so I've to keep working and trying for a better income.

Peoples around me started to getting further and further from me and for a guy that without a car like me... It's difficult to get new friends (since the old one all left to work and forget bout friends after get into a relationship) even trying to get a partner for ourselves also a problem.

Sigh! I really don't know what am I writing now, whatever that crossed my mind... I just type it out! Trying to release out my stress on my daily routine.

Now, I started to miss my past... 1st, the schooling times was the greatest time I ever had but that already gone, no more and we need to look forward.
2nd, my grandfather... he used to scold me everytime before he past away and I keep arguing with him whenever he scold me and I know it's not a good way and I admit that I'm not a good grandson or maybe a son to my parents. I've been trying hard to do what I wish to do but everything just not going the way I want it to be. (most of the times, its happened to be like this not only me but everyone rite?) Grandpa, I'm sorry that I've never be a good grandson when you're still here.
3rd, I miss my ex too... she's the girl that gave me the feels that cant get out from my heart till now. It's a long story about this relationship... it's the feels that I wont get to forget forever! When I first saw her, I already get attracted by her not because of her outlooks... is bout the inner feels I get to sense from her. It's sound ridiculous but it's true... until now, although we hardly get to contact each other but I still miss her much.

Although I keep saying I'm not going to get a gf that's so fake! Everyone deserved to get a partner for your life... you just have to keep trying, that's all!

Oh! It's 2.06am now.... still need to wake up at 7.00am to work, I guess I just have to stop here, get on my bed and get a good rest!

Hope everyone will get a better days later, night!

No comments: